I've been thinking about life post transplant recently. The whole idea of life afterwards is exciting, amazing, scary and daunting all at once. I am used to having Cf as I have dealt with it for 21 years, but when I have new lungs I will be in a whole different world of sensations, feelings as well as a new medical area to have to learn about. As you can imagine thinking about all of this in any detail is rather overwealming.
Over the last few days I've been focusing specifically on something I hadn't really thought about. Apart from being in a completely unfamiliar world physically and mentally, my body will change in its appearance too.
I will have a scar accross my chest, probably under my breasts running from one side to the other or possibly straight down the middle, it depends on surgeons preference. I will probably also have a few smaller scars on my upper body from the chest drains I will have in.
My skin will probably have quite a lot of spots etc because of the shock to my system and of course the barrage of drugs that I will need afterwards. Hopefully this will calm down as my body adjusts.
I am hoping that my back which is quite curved at the moment, something I absolutely HATE and really upsets me, should straighten slightly. I was unaware of this until recently but apparently it can happen, and for me would be a real bonus as I have tried without success to get help with my spine for years.
One aspect that does bother me (even though I know it shouldn't) is that of body hair. One of the anti rejection drugs can make hair on arms, legs,face etc grow much more and quite dark. As I am very dark haired naturally this may make it worse. I know there are lots of ways to remove or bleach hair, (i cant use electrolysis due to infection risk) but I hate the idea of either having to put up with the problem or constantly struggling to cover it up.
These problems are not big in the scheme of things and I feel bad for even blogging about them when some others have to put up with so much worse, but it does bother me and sometimes these issues as well as everything else can just make it seem very very hard and as though there is no end in sight, just new problems.
Rest assured I will face anything that comes along, and hopefully find solutions with the support of others. I suppose this is the very reason I shouldn't give myself too much time to sit and think....