This was a post I wrote a while ago but am only just about to post but I had to add a little addendum to say a huge thank you to the people who tweeted and commented on my last blog. You don't know how much it meant. I'm still struggling but am taking action to hopefully get myself in a better place. Depression is always going to be something that rears its ugly head but finding ways to cope when it does is my main goal. Thank you for the love xxxx
I love Autumn. I always have loved it actually since I was little. If I had to put the seasons in order of preference, controversially I'd say; Autumn, Spring, Winter, Summer. I know people love the Summer and sun but when you have Chronic breathing problems you don't necessarily enjoy the Summer so much. Some of my CF friends adore the Summer, hot weather, humidity as they find they feel better, breathe easier, don't have the worry of colds and viruses to make them sick. But for me personally, I used to and still do to an extent, find the hot weather extremely draining. Heat made breathing incredibly hard and humidity practically killed me. When I was waiting for transplant, the hot weather often saw me stuck inside, a fan trained on me in a vain attempt to get some cool air to breathe in, blinds shut, gasping for breath, hot sweaty and miserable. It made it so unbelievably difficult and exhausting to draw in breath that thinking back I don't know how the hell I did it second after second day after day. Summer became something to dread.
Autumn was a saviour. You still had some of the beautiful sunshine that uplifts your mood but it wasn't so oppressive and demanding, it was Summers gentler, calmer cousin. I could enjoy it a lot more without being in agony trying to catch my breath. Now the Summer doesn't bother me a 1/10 as much as it used to but I do still struggle when it's very hot or humid.
Autumn is so beautiful so here are some of the reasons I love it.
Like I've just explained, the weaker but just as wonderful sunshine and heat suit me down to the ground. There's a nice breeze but still gorgeously sunny. Autumn sunshine dappled through the trees is just perfect.
Beautiful pale sunshine combined with absolutely gorgeous colours of Autumn leaves makes my heart happy. You look around and see so many amazing shades. It should be a bit sad to see things dying off but what a way to go! Glorious reds, burnt oranges, bright yellows, coppers, golds, greens. Just divine.
There is a big conker tree down our road that I used to pass on my way to school as a kid. I love conkers. I always used to collect them, I love their gorgeous deep coppery brown shades, the shine, the green prickly cases (the dream was to find one still in its case so you could prise it out all shiny and new). I'll be honest, only thing I don't like is their smell. Even now when I walk past the tree the compulsion to be a small child and pick one up always wins. When I was small, there was a street nearby that was lined with conker trees on both sides, my parents used to take me there and I would come home with a huge conker haul, clearly I was easily pleased 😊
Dark nights and twinkle lights
The darker nights means more time in bed, win. It also means that there are more fairy lights round the city, restaurants etc. Again, cheers my day up to see them around! And candles, candlelight is so pretty and calming.
Halloween, Bonfire Night and Christmas
Onthe sometimes dark days of Autumn, we have all these holidays. Oddly, never celebrated Halloween as a kid and don't really celebrate bonfire night very often but I always liked sitting and watching the sky light up with fireworks. Once while I was ill waiting for transplant my sister and her then fiancée tried to cheer me up by inviting me over for food and fireworks. We ended up nearly exploding the house when a firework got a bit close and I was on portable oxygen at the time so I could well have been blown to Kingdom come. One of those days you'll always remember for the wrong reasons but it was extremely funny in a 'oh my god nearly killed ourselves' kind of way. I am a big fan of Christmas. When everyone else loudly moans about it being October and there are already Christmas decorations in the shops I'm secretly grinning and bouncing around in excitement.
Probably the thing I missed most about not being able to do things pre transplant was Christmas. I couldn't really decorate the tree and when I did I felt so god awful ill it kind of killed it, wrapping presents, cooking etc where all too high energy. Now I get involved with everything and often plan too much in my keeness never to miss out again. There will be many more Christmassy blog posts just warning you. All the best celebrations are in Autumn!
Tea, blankets, baths
Ask anyone I know and they will tell you I'm a tea addict, I drink it all the time. I discovered I get pretty grumpy if I don't get my fix too. I also love a cute mug, to the point where I've been banned from buying any more because we have too many (lies, you can't have too many). Anyway, going to restaurant and ordering tea at most other time of year is often met with a questioning look, but in autumn its normal! Yay! The shops have the softest blankets to curl up with and watch tv (while drinking tea from a pretty mug). I'm a home bird and its a good excuse to be all cosy with none of the judging. In Autumn and winter I also go back to having more baths which I forget are amazing till I have one and remember again. If you're having a bath there really should be some Lush involved in there somewhere too. These are things I enjoy way to much but Autumn gives me the opportunity not to look quite so much of a reclusive tea drinking hermit because everyone else is doing it too.
Scarves and gloves.
The scarf is the second item I've been banned from buying because I may, *may* have two boxes of scarves which I'm told is enough for anyone. I still lust over them though. But gutted as I seem to having really rather hideous hot sweats at the moment which means that. While everyone else walks round in jumpers, coats etc I'm swanning around in a short sleeve tshirt sweating like a pig. But I'm hoping I will get the chance to add some scarves to my outfits soon. I love them, gorgeous patterns, over a plain coat. My hands are always cold so gloves are a must. Neither scarves nor gloves, nor jumpers come to that should be in any way itchy. That just ruins the whole thing. Soft, cosy, pretty.
Anyway that's probably bored you to tears but these are some of the reason we are entering my most favouritist time of the year!